June 26, 2012
In the reading corner and number corner, did I ever tell you that you were sitting like you had ants in your pants? It seems like I may have, but I don't remember my specific wording. In any case, I can now tell you, with certainty, exactly what it looks and feels like to literally have ants in your pants. It's not the best feeling in the world. I'd put it up there with having a cold or dropping your ice cream cone on the ground.
Boonme loves to eat from the trees where the ants live and where it was that I was convinced against my better judgement to taste one. Elephants' skin is an inch thick in some places, so tree branches and ants don't bother them. Humans, on the other hand? It takes all my concentration to stay put while trying to bat away branches. Then add in the fact that Boonme has basically paraded me into the ants' home without their permission and given them full access to me.
Having ants in your pants is a desperate situation, especially when you are wearing long pants and can start to feel pinpricks of ant bites on your knees. Lucky for me, I was wearing those super cool, stylish hiking pants that unzip at the knee to become shorts. I was able to make the transformation, balanced atop an elephant, all while being eaten alive. For that, I am pretty sure that I should be in the pant company's next advertising campaign. Also, I hereby give you permission from this point on, in any reading corner, to be fidgety and restless if you do in fact have ants in your pants.
P.S. You may be disappointed to know that I have no intention of eating any more insects.